Day 16

One lesson I've been learning of late (like the last three years) is that of not being a procrastinator (which is why I've written all but 2 of these posts so far 30 minutes on either side of midnight! I'm a good learner!). Honestly, and perhaps a little tragically, I'm really good at it and I produce good results! I'm not one of those who does a crappy job on last minute stuff. I do good work when I'm under pressure. I once got a 100% on a major research paper in grad. school that I started on 8 hours before it was due. Friends of mine in the same class had been working on it for literally 6 weeks and received solid B's. I'm not bragging about this, it's just how it happened. Not all my efforts pan out with good results, but usually, I can trust that I'll do well on something, even if it's last minute.

I wonder though, if this is a hindrance or a gift. It's probably both, but I want to make sure that it's more of a gift than a hindrance, both to me and those in my life. I know that because of this ability, I take on a lot. I also know that because of it, I can carry on almost any conversation with an intelligent thought. However, not all situations merit such haphazard focus. Some actually need a real concentrated effort. Not all conversations should be entered into without careful consideration and prayer. Because of this tendency in me, I usually err on the side of procrastination, which, during those times, makes me a VERY ENJOYABLE person to be around (just ask james)!

This is one reason I decide to do posts like this, at least during Lent, for 40 days. It's a tangible way I can focus my thoughts and carefully consider things. In the fast paced world I live in, consideration is a lost art, and I need to practice! I need to slow my mind down and consider my days: what's taken place in them, who I've had relationship with, who I haven't, stopping and listening to what God is saying to me, waiting on Him to see how I'm to apply that to my life, considering who I've wronged, figuring out how to right that wrong, talking with God, noticing areas of growth, and perhaps changing my trajectory through the prompting of the Holy Spirit.

Now listen, you who say, “Today or tomorrow we will go to this or that city, spend a year there, carry on business and make money.” Why, you do not even know what will happen tomorrow. What is your life? You are a mist that appears for a little while and then vanishes. Instead, you ought to say, “If it is the Lord’s will, we will live and do this or that.” As it is, you boast in your arrogant schemes. All such boasting is evil. If anyone, then, knows the good they ought to do and doesn’t do it, it is sin for them.

I read these verses from James 4, and am reminded that though we make plan after plan after plan, our lives are not our own. We aren't ultimately in control! I can plan away or procrastinate. Neither really matters if I haven't bothered to ask God what He wants. And if God does want me to do something, I need to remember that I'm representing The Holy God! So I had better do the good I know I ought to do rather than frittering away my talents, gifts, opportunities, and lessons to be learned, or perhaps even worse, banking on my own abilities to carry me through.