Oi vay . . . this is not easy! Headaches for two days straight and my stomach is all messed up! Too bad we can't get close to Jesus with just our mind, right?! But no, He requires ALL of us-- mind, soul, and body. I'm glad He does though, even if it literally hurts! So thoughts on day one and day two:
- I really like meat
- People either have no interest or great interest in Lent
- Those with great interest have made for good conversations. Gives me something to think on other than all the growling of my tummy.
- Jesus likens fasting to mourning in Matthew 9. Never made that connection before.
- I really like cheese
- I do way better in handling emotional pain than physical pain
- One person's interpretation of the purpose of Lent is "self-examination and penitence, demonstrated by self-denial, in preparation for Easter,*" while anothers' is "return to God with all our hearts.**"
- Avocados and black beans are God's gift to me
- A friend of mine encouraged me by describing Lent as "giving up the things in which we find joy so that our joy can be found solely in Christ."
- I find a lot of joy in food
- I'm a lot colder when I have a restricted diet
- Lent has been around for a LONG time, but very few practice it *
- I really like pizza
- Costco is a very bad place to be when you are hungry
- Edamame is fun to eat
- I better lose a bunch of weight this month
It would be really convenient to pick and choose the parts I want to give to God. Then I could give Him the parts that are really screwed up or really pretty. Because honestly, who doesn't want to be fixed or praised? But all those "common" or seemingly "non-essential" parts of me . . . you know the boring and non-sensational stuff . . . those are the things that make me comfortable and, well, me--I know He wants those things too, and I like to say I give Him those things daily, but do I? Really? Do I really want to give up my "Thursday night family ritual of Costco pizza after gymnastics" for four weeks for the sake of self-examination and penitence? Do I really want to pass on the "apple turnovers my dear co-op friend brought to share with the Spanish class" for the sake of returning to God with all my heart? Do I really want to spend every spare moment of my next 40+ days talking/thinking/arguing with myself or others about ALL THIS? Really?
I'm a smart person. I can think of a million other ways I can self-reflect and return to God, and frankly, they'd be awesome! I could probably even sell them to churches as amazing experiential programs. But, would they cost me anything? Would they challenge me where it counts the most--- where it's comfortable and mundane? Maybe that's where this Lent thing has merit, because maybe it's in the ordinary things that we take for granted (like what we put in our mouths or where we spend our time or what we think about) that God really wants us to give Him. Recently I heard a speaker say, "people are excellent at understanding God's saving grace, but after we're saved, we go right back into functioning in our works based mentality." How true is that? We usually only want God when we're desperate or we're sensational. But then we don't invite Him or His grace in to the rest of our lives because we somehow think we can or should do it on our own. As a result, our lives (mind, soul, and body), the boring things, become totally about us and really not at all about Him. One last thought- don't embark on a journey like this if you're not willing to see the truth about who you are. Till tomorrow . . .
* http://www.christianitytoday.com/ch/news/2004/lent.html
** http://www.thetransformingcenter.org/blog/ereflections/the-fast-god-chooses-an-invitation-to-lent/
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